An eating disorder is like a pair of armbands, keeping you afloat when otherwise you feel like you would drown. It makes life easier in many cases – by holding onto your disorder you feel like you have control and feel like you are able to accomplish things.

When I became a parent, my eating disorder didn’t magically disappear. When she was a baby and I was home alone with her, there was no one to check up on me, no one to HAVE to eat in front of.

Even though I sometimes feel that I woke up one day with an eating disorder out of nowhere, that definitely wasn’t the case. It grew over many weeks, months, even years.

I feel unable to say I have anorexia because my eating disorder makes me think my weight and my thoughts and behaviours around controlling food are normal. I am afraid I don’t deserve treatment, and my eating disorder tells me if my BMI isn’t as low as it could possibly be then it isn’t low enough.

I started engaging in unhealthy habits in the summer after my first year of university. I had loved every moment; I’d joined a gym and swimming club, met an incredible group of friends and felt settled in my degree.

I got diagnosed with OCD when I was very young. My OCD varied on different topics, but later in life my OCD fixated on food, and within time I developed an eating disorder.

University – a time full of new experiences, new friends, new skills and also new challenges. My first year at university ended up being the most challenging and unpredictable year of my life.

For a bit of background about me - I have struggled with my eating disorder since I was 16 (I am now 24 and in recovery). I never knew that it had taken hold of me that young until I started to talk about my experience and tracked it back.

It all started from several stressful events in my life, which I dealt with by exercising and controlling what I ate. Prior to its the development, I was a happy, loud and approachable character whom friends or family would turn to.

When it comes to thinking about the physical damage that may be done by an eating disorder, it isn’t uncommon to hear mention of fertility, particularly when it comes to anorexia.

Growing up, Christmas was my absolute favourite time of year and now that I am rid of my eating disorder, I am free to enjoy the festivities once again. However, I spent two awful Christmastimes, the first with bulimia and the second with binge eating disorder.

Instead of living your life pretending it didn’t happen, we need to start embracing the past and using it as an experience that we’ve learnt from.

Not once did I believe I'd be free of the rules of self-cruelty. But here I am, free of my compulsion to lose weight, free of bulimia and with a free mind.

I’ve recently started to take personal development a bit more seriously, and I’ve spent a good amount of time reflecting on my recent past as a result.

Recovery is like a swimming pool with no shallow end. You can’t just dip your toe into the water or walk in until it’s up to your knees for it to work.

At the age of eight, I started to see a change in myself. I started comparing myself to everybody I saw.

The demands of maintaining an eating disorder alongside working full-time were too much, and the eating disorder often won.

I felt sick all the time. Thought about food all the time. Lied and kept secrets and snuck around and hid. I did some terrible things.

Without a doubt, people look at you and long for your long curly hair, your curves, your eyes or your confidence.

I'm going to change the stigma surrounding eating disorders, help those going through the struggles of battling voices telling them they're not good enough.