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Christmas has always been a very busy and exciting time for me. Singing with my church choir, playing at events with the school orchestra – there was an endless number of things that I looked forward to. Many involved food and going out for meals, which I also loved to do.
Approaching the end of my psychotherapy sessions I am so grateful for finally receiving the correct help. I remember being completely convinced that I was going to be laughed out of therapy and told ‘you’re fine, you’re not ill enough yet, what are you doing here?’
When I was a teenager, members of my family – parents and aunts – grumbled daily about what they alleged was wrong with me. This included my weight and size. “Hefty” and “solid” are to this day words that make me wince.
Growing up, Christmas was my absolute favourite time of year and now that I am rid of my eating disorder, I am free to enjoy the festivities once again. However, I spent two awful Christmastimes, the first with bulimia and the second with binge eating disorder.
Just like every other human emotion and experience, eating disorders are full of colour, chemicals, and different combinations. No two experiences are the same.
The run up to Christmas can be really exciting: preparing for holidays, time with family and friends, parties, presents and often lots of food. But that excitement can be equalled and even overshadowed by worry, guilt, resentment and panic.
When it comes to thinking about the physical damage that may be done by an eating disorder, it isn’t uncommon to hear mention of fertility, particularly when it comes to anorexia.
The trek challenged me both mentally and physically, and pushed me far out of my comfort zone!
I’ve chosen to raise funds for Beat for a very special, personal reason. In the summer of 2013, I was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa.
My partner and I chose the Great North Run to be our challenge because we knew it would be a push for us.
Kelly took part in a trek through the Icelandic wilderness to fundraise for Beat & has answered some questions to inspire other fundraisers!
It was in July this year that I completed the Iceland Trek. I signed up in August last year, thinking I had plenty of time to get my act together.