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Anorexia

All stories

I have always thought of myself as a very logical, objective person. But looking at the person that anorexia has made me become, I couldn’t be any further from that.

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An eating disorder is not about an extremely low Body Mass Index (BMI) or an emaciated figure, and even though this is how it ended up for me it makes me wonder, now I am on the road to recovery, if my road could have been different.

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What I can tell you about my experience of the early stages of relapse I hope will be helpful to friends/family/colleagues and employers and people in recovery, to make helpful choices and not ones that mirror the eating disorder anxiety and control.

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I soon learned that rushing recovery was one thing that was stopping me from recovering. I was trying to be not only perfect within anorexia but also to have a perfect recovery – both unreachable goals.

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None of these things would have been possible had I given in to the voices which told me I was too fat (they still do), that I didn’t need that much food, that as a skeleton, I had achieved perfection.

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If you're like me and feeling rubbish about not getting well, you're not alone. If your friend or family member has been living with an eating disorder for years please don't give up on them recovering.

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The last few months have marked some of the most significant events in my life to date. After six years I am no longer under the care of an eating disorders service, and after five years I have qualified as a Doctor.

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It’s okay not to be okay. It’s okay to ask for help. I know you’re scared, I know you’re striving for something, and I know you might not even know what that something is anymore.

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25 June 2018

Why the shame?

Recovering from anorexia was the most difficult thing I’ve ever had to do, but certainly the one thing that changed my life and me beyond recognition…in the best way possible.

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My friend has suffered from an eating disorder since she was ten years old. No one really knows why it started but some events clearly led up to it.

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Eating disorders affect people of all ages, backgrounds, and genders. But often people have narrow expectations about what someone with an eating disorder looks like, and this can lead to additional barriers to support and treatment for those who fall outside those expectations.

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I was 12 years old when I was first diagnosed with an eating disorder. I remember because it was just after Christmas – I was in Year 8 at school and had just recovered from the flu.

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