I wake up each morningI take a deep breathI sit there and listenTo thoughts in my head.
I count all the numbersI refuse the foodA constant behaviourThat controls my mood.
I hear all my loved onesKeep asking me “why?”Still I sit there in silenceTears flow from my eyes.
'Till one day it happensSlowly but sureI pluck up the courageAnd open the door.
At first I am scaredConfused and afraidBut something tells meThat I'll be okay.
Before I was sittingTrying just to surviveBut now I am livingNow I'm alive.
Recovery must be your choice, the one you must make despite the eating disorder feeling like your only friend, this is not real, it’s an illusion, it’s all fake.
At school her best friend called her fat. She took up a measuring tape and that was that.
Completing my A levels was hard. I soon became obsessed with revision and control, not feeling like I had ever done enough or was enough.