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I seem to have lost the old me,Forgotten the woman I used to be,I used to be brave, I used to be strong,When and how did things go so wrong?
When I was suffering from anorexia, I was striving for what I believed to be the perfect life.
There are hundreds, thousands maybe, of stereotypes surrounding anorexia. And some of them might be true. For some people.
Recovery... Everyone is always told “to choose recovery” but we are never told exactly how to achieve this or what this even really means.
I was 12 years old when I first made myself sick. Looking back, I can’t remember why I did it, but I had no idea how quickly it would take over my life.
Recovery is a long road. Sometimes there will be bumps and hills and the occasional spiral, but you learn to make yourself stronger each time you are set back.
To my fellow fighters: as you know, eating disorders are often glamorised and seen as a fashionable thing had by models and celebrities. As you know, the harsh reality is not so glamorous.
An eating disorder is never easy. Recovering from an eating disorder is never easy either, but don’t ever let it get you down. You’re not weak, so don’t let your eating disorder tell you differently.
Any recovery takes time. There’s no set pace or step-by-step guide and everyone will have a different experience going through recovery.
On the surface, I do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING – no full-time job, no university studies, no running, no dance classes, no responsibilities. I can lounge around all day, take nap after nap and am not expected to be ‘productive’.
It is incredibly difficult to say those three words within your own mind, let alone unleashing them aloud: I need help.
We live in a world where our society defines us. A world where we must look perfect and act perfect to fit in. But what is perfect? What is normal?